R. Kelly is set to release a tell-all book that delivers everything we wanted, and didn’t want to know, about the man known as Robert Kelly.

“I’m writing this book as Robert, not R. Kelly,” he said. “I’m tired of being misunderstood. I will show you the tears, fears, and sweat. I will open my heart and reveal the good in my life as well as all the drama. I want to tell it like it is.”

By misunderstood does he mean we don’t understand why he likes to urinate on teenaged girls? Find out when “Soulacoaster” (get it? Like Rollercoaster??) hits shelves in 2012. Joking aside, it should make an entertaining read.